Fast & Furious 5

Well today I finally got to watch FAST & FURIOUS  5!!!! It was an awesome movie, a must be seen movie as my friends say. Practically had the cinema to our self hardly anyone went. Paul Walker * drools* even though he’s 38 but god damn HE’S HOTTTT!!! Kim and I kinda finished the popcorn before the movie started next time gotta resist . Awkwardly waiting for my friends to come I stood there like a freak as people walked by. Had to say it was an awkward moment,  because from far it looked like I was hugging the pole haha.

It was suppose to be a 3 person movie session today but then Lisa rocked up like 2 hours later there goes our plan but then she joined afterwards for dinner. Had a scrumptious meal at Cafe Primo with my BBFL and Lisa, while eating I noticed this cute waiter dayummm he was cute, but too short. I prefer tall -ish guys.  As he came by to drop off Lisa’s juice without realising it I started to smile awkwardly. Think I’m turning back to my old self, been a while since I played around like this. Oh gawd I was craving for prawns all day finally I ordered a Seafood Platter it was nice at first but then got a bit sickening afterwards. But then the prawns on Lisa’s plate look much nicer.

There I spent my day drooling over Paul Walker and that unknown waiter.

An ending to everything

Well it has been over a week since everything happened. Friday was the start of my new life. For the past week I have been trapped in the past not being able to see the light. Crying countless times, I had to say it was the hardest week of my life. For the last time, I tried again but then as expected the same answer was given. His reply was ‘It’s getting repetitive’ that’s when I noticed, it sure was. I didn’t know what was wrong with me at that time seriously. When he said that I felt terrible, knowing that he doesn’t want me to bother him anymore. So I finally let go and moved on. Declaring it on Facebook that I have officially moved on and striving for something new. But what’s funny is that he laughed at it and mocked me. Is there something funny about telling him that I’ve moved on? Can’t believe how much a person can change over a week time. I still had the respect for him during that week, but after knowing his true self tsk I dont think I can ever respect someone like that again. BUT! That’s the past. Whatever happened in the past stays in the past. A quote that I found meaningful on tumblr.

“An ex should stay an EX. They’re an EXample of the wrong love & an EXplanation for why you deserve better! ” prettypilpina of tumblr

If I understood or saw this message as soon as I broke up then I would had never attempted to ask him anything. I wouldn’t have cried over him or anything at all. Should have moved on and not look back. But then I saw this quote soon after...

“If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.” – Johnny Depp

When I read this quote something just sparked me. Does this have some meaning to me? It then made me confused about my decision that I’ve made in early March. Was it him that I was supposed to be with or was it someone else nearby. At times I wonder if I did not choose him and went for someone else how would I be right now.  But people make mistakes not once but many times. Humans are designed to make mistakes and learn from then in order to fit into society. From this relationship I learnt not to trust the other person too much because one day they will turn their back on you. “Don’t fall too deep” as one of my friends had told me because one day you will find yourself too deep in which you can’t escape.

That’s all in the past now and I can learn from it. May is going to start the new chapter in my life in which I try to avoid as many mistakes as possible. I’m going to find the right love of my life and not regret like this time. Make the most of the time that there is left in this world.

This is going to be the last post about this person ever. A wrap up of this persons importance in my life and signficance.Now its time for me to move on and be with someone I should of been with right at the beginning.

Bye past and welcome future

Taking risks

I had so many words but no courage. If I did had courage to say what I wanted to say yesterday then it may have an impact on today. I would have to say that I am a girl with great pride but in which today I had to throw away in order to get what I want. But in the end I didn’t get what I wanted. If it wasn’t for yesterday I would never had second thoughts honestly. All night I was not able to sleep, my heart and mind ached. The tears ran down my cheeks as I thought about everything we went through together. It hurts to know that we will never be able to return to where we were before. Even though I told him to move on countless times but in the end I couldn’t myself.

Women are soft hearted. We are foolish, but then we do learn from our mistakes. Not until today that I realised how foolish and stupid I was. Not respecting my own pride I pushed it aside and in the end I embarrassed myself. But that’s life for ya. Taking risks even though you know that you may fail, but it’s always worth a try. It doesn’t hurt to try. Like I told him, do what you think is right even though you know you might get rejected. Never be scared to strive for what you want and need most. That’s the determination I have. I have to say that you’re selfish; that you never gave me the chance to try when I gave you a chance to change your mind. That’s what hurts me the most that you never gave me time to change your mind.

I had a lot of reasons to give up on you but I still chose to stay. You had a lot of reasons to stay, but you chose to give up.

Therefore be careful to whom you give your heart because when you give your heart to someone, you’re not only giving that person the right to love you but also the power to hurt you.



Goodbye my love...

Happiest decision

So today I have to say victory was mine. After stressing about it all week I finally had the courage and ended the realtionship with him and let go. For the past month I thought life couldn’t get any more special than this. The smile he brought to my face brightens up my world a little bit more. I was glad that he was there when I needed him. The memories that we created together will be kept within our hearts for the rest of our life. I had fun and so did he. I hope I gave him enough experience in which he knows to treat his next lover better. From this relationship I hope he learnt to be more mature about a relationship rather than being unsure most of the time. Decide what you want, what you need is what’s important.  Like you said, I deserve someone better. Someone whose heart will not change over like one second. Someone who wouldn’t make me cry and break my heart. At the beginning I thought that you would’ve been that person that I’ve been searching for. But guess it was a mistake. To be honest Ionced loved you so dearly.Like some people say first love doesn’t last... 

Thanks for the adventure now go and enjoy yours

For my girls out there, I am truly thankful for all the time you spared for me and listened to my problems throughout the month. Thank you for being there for me the whole time when I struggled to move on. Mostly I want to thank Kim for being there throughout my good and bad. I love you sooooo much my dear friend. Oh had the best strawberry and cream cake today which KIM! bought for me thankyouu it was delicious and filled me with love that I needed.

 Now it’s time for me to move on and find my Mr right who is waiting for me out there!

Game on brah! :D



Changes

Things seem to be getting harder for me. It’s so hard to hold onto those tears anymore. When that person is near I can help it but release all my sadness towards them. Walking side by side I can feel the distance between us. The awkward silence which kills the mood, I hated it. I really do. Not being able to face and smile like usual made me feel and wonder why it’s happening. Why things are the way it is now and why it had to change. Weren’t we normal just not long ago? It’s so sudden, hard to accept the truth right now.

At times I wonder why you comfort me, when I cry or feeling blue.  Why do you hold me and tell me it’s going to be okay? I rather not receive that from you, honestly. It hurts even more. My body tells me that I can’t take much more or else I’m going to lose it. I’m just too weak now to handle anymore of this. I just want a definite answer. So please…I earnestly ask you to make your choice now and don’t hurt me any longer.

Life is unexpected

Today I have to say would be a very gloomy day for me. A lot of things went through my mind today.  The problems that aroused confused me and made me a worry. Everyone thought that it was just me overreacting about it, but it was what I had expected. I wonder what goes through that certain person’s mind at times. I wonder where my presence is and how much I mean to them.  At the start I thought and hoped that our path will be a very long lovely path in which we can walk together over a long period of time. But now our path  ahead seems to be unclear and dark.

No one meant so much to me before, have to say it’s the first time I ever felt like this in my life. The happiness that certain individual brings to my life and day. The sun seems to be sunnier as that person is around. Their smile brightens up my gloomy day. But I don’t receive that smile like I did before anymore. I’m frightened of what’s coming. At times I want to avoid the truth but it’s too hard. Hope tonight allows the person to think through what  they really wants and need from me. Even how mad and frustrated I get, I still love that person dearly. Hope they feel the same too. I really miss you . Promise to be there by your side whenever you need. Hope our future is going to be happy and loving everyday

 I L O V E Y O U .......♥

Fantasy vs Reality

For the past few days I have been on a search finding the right book to read in order to improve my vocabulary. Thanks to Thanh ( Lindah) I have found it. I highly recommend everyone to read  Jessica's Guide to Dating on the Dark Side by  Beth Fantaskey ♥ ♥ ♥

Even though I only started reading this today but it is soooooo interesting! The main guy Lucius Vladescu reminds me of Thanh so much. Their personality seems to similar as they are both posh with looks and personality. I hope that I will finish this book by Sunday * fingers crossed*  READ IT READ IT : )


The most embarrassing thing happened today as I ducked my head down on the bus because I saw someone unexpected. Instead of hiding away in a girly manner, I banged my hip onto the pole and now I have a massive bruise. Hurts like a bitch! I think the weather made me weirder. After school caught the bus home and bloody hell these two viet fobs got on and talked viet nonstop drove me insane. Literally, not going on that bus again!

Can’t wait until tomorrow YAY! It’s Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday.
Gonna get ice cream after school with Kimmy.  Finally the week is coming to an end and then one more week of school and we’re on holidays. EASSTER! Eggs yum yum....my friends who are reading this I’m expecting something good this Easter * hint hint ,Kim * Been planning out what I want to do with my girlfriends on the holidays, wonder if we even end up doing all the things we said. Hope it’s going to be a carefree and enjoyable holiday.

Okay gonna end this post with a song that Kim and I is going to be using for our presentation next week. Heaven- DJ Sammy 911 remix a song in which you can understand the importance of your loved ones.

Enjoy! Bye bye   



The Start.

Hi there!
This is my first post ever. Ever since I deactivated my Facebook for various of reasons, I have came to a conclusion where I am now going to offically blog about my life and how interesting(?) it is.  Got to see my boyfriend as usual this morning but then after he left for school it seemed like I miss him more and more. We dont get to see each other as much, only about 30 minutes in the morning when he walks me to school with his friends.I'm still glad that I get to see him everyday nearly...he's prob is reading this now

I LOVE YOU RR ♥ 

Well yeah at school today it felt like the day would never end. Cant wait until tomorrow arrives. Its our one month this Sunday and I'm really looking forward to it. Even though we've been 'seeing' each other for months but this is going to be our offical  month  :) Took us a while though.  Hope I'm allowed to go out this weekend ,if not it's going to be terrrible.
Offically went to my first Formal last Friday. As soon as I arrived to school all the girls would run up to me and ask " Oh How was it?!" Didnt say much to them cause to be honest it wasnt that great.Got to go to my first formal with someone i like so much and with friends that I know well. I could say it wasnt so bad. Danced the night away with the girls singing random songs that played. The food was sooooooooooo crap! Only thing that tasted good was the bread and of course COKE :D Worst formal pictures ever! Hate the photographer like hell. Even I can take better pictures than that! geeezzz not gonna take any photos at the next formal.

Anways after school was hectic went around town to wait for my mum to pick me up and she rocks up one hour late! Got home around 5:30 and now im up writing this blog instead of revising for me physics formative test tomorrow.

Going to wrap it up now today I got a suprise from Tommy my little buddy who dedicated his love to me through singing "Just the Way you Are" Cutest Kid EVER! my boyfriend so jealous of this guy :p He made my day much happier today.

watch it and enjoy :)

Formal

The night had  finally came....

Christian Brothers College Formal 2011

                                                                  fail group pic lol

                                                                                  'A!'

                                                                      Me & Roeland ♥

                                                                      Jemima & Mai

Pietro & Chloe . Cute :D

 Alan & Joiee

 my awesome pic ♥

Went to Grand Stamford Hotel, enjoyed our Formal night together as a group. :)